Rethinking how we Celebrate Mother's Day

Mother's Day in Mexico

By Jenna Mayhew, Psychologist 

Every year on May 10th, Mexico celebrates Día de las Madres—a day filled with love, music, flowers, and family meals. As an Australian psychologist living in Mexico, I’ve been moved by how deeply motherhood is honored here. 

And while it’s a beautiful celebration, Mother’s Day also offers us an opportunity to reflect on the mental health of mothers—not just their sacrifices, but their emotional and psychological well-being.

The Vulnerable Side of Early Motherhood

In my own research in Australia, I focused on postnatal anxiety. So in the lead up to mother’s day, I was curious about what the research could tell us about motherhood in Mexico. 

Understanding Motherhood in Mexico

According to the OECD, the average age of mothers in Mexico is 27—lower than in countries like the U.S. Australia and the UK (29, 31 and 31 respectively). In 2012, around 20% of mothers were adolescents. so it’s worth keeping in mind as we look at these results. 

Research by Díaz-Loving and colleagues highlights how traditional gender roles are still influential: fathers are often seen as the family authority, while mothers are expected to be selfless and nurturing. Despite growing diversity in family structures, these roles continue to shape expectations around motherhood. I felt the theme of self-sacrifice for mothers, was aptly summarised by the title of the this one journal article: “‘You withhold what you are feeling so you can have a family’: Latinas’ perceptions on community values and postpartum depression. (Sampson et. al., 2021). Wow, as a psychologist, that one hit hard. 

Motherhood, Mental Health, and the Surprising Side of Tradition

When we talk about motherhood, mental health, and gender roles, the conversation often focuses on stress and sacrifice. But what if, for some women, following traditional roles actually improves their wellbeing?

A compelling study by Delgado-Herrera et al. (2024) explored Mexican family life by completing three separate studies. The researchers used tools like the Attitudes Towards Gender Roles Scale and the Motherhood Beliefs Scale to understand how women’s beliefs about gender and motherhood relate to their psychological wellbeing.

Men and the Endurance of Inequality

One of the key findings was that men tended to favor traditional gender roles, where women are expected to shoulder domestic and caregiving responsibilities. This preference wasn’t just a personal choice—it played a role in sustaining inequality. The researchers noted that this dynamic hindered women’s access to equal opportunities and allowed men to benefit from the status quo.

So while in some cultures and certain some homes, traditional roles may coexist with equity, overall that wasn’t the case here. Instead, these traditional expectations appeared to reinforce systemic imbalances. 

Tradition and Psychological Wellbeing

Mother's who follow traditional gender roles in Mexico experience less psychological distress.

Consequently, the researchers had assumed that women who endorsed traditional gender roles would report higher levels of anxiety and depression. But what they found was the opposite: women who strongly embraced these traditional roles actually experienced lower levels of psychological distress.

Why might this be?

The answer may lie in what’s known as the congruence hypothesis. This theory suggests that when people align their behavior with what society expects—especially in cultures where group harmony and approval are highly valued—it can protect their mental health. In a collectivist culture like Mexico, choosing the path of least resistance can offer stability and a sense of belonging, even if it limits other opportunities.

The Double Burden of Breaking the Mold

The study also found that women who pursued employment outside the home while also raising children experienced more mental health challenges. The dual demands of professional and domestic life created additional pressure—leaving these women stretched thin and more vulnerable to stress.

This puts mothers in a tough spot. Challenging traditional norms might bring a sense of empowerment or progress, but it can also come with social backlash and emotional strain. On the other hand, sticking to familiar gender roles may provide social validation, but at the cost of personal aspirations.

 A Mother’s Day Reflection

This might not feel like the cheeriest takeaway for Mother’s Day—but it is an important one. It invites us to rethink how we honor and celebrate mothers.

Rather than focusing only on sacrifice or on fulfilling a social role, perhaps we can celebrate mothers for their choices—for the strength it takes to raise children in a way that aligns with their values, whether that means following tradition or forging a new path. And perhaps the greatest gift a mother gives isn’t just her selflessness, but the way she models self-love, resilience, and authenticity.

So this Mother’s Day, we send a warm and heartfelt thank you to all the mothers in our community. Thank you for all that you do—for your children, and for yourself. However you’ve chosen to walk the journey of motherhood, we honor that path.

Happy Mother’s Day.

References

Delgado-Herrera M, Aceves-Gómez AC, Reyes-Aguilar A (2024) Relationship between gender roles, motherhood beliefs and mental health. PLoS ONE 19(3): e0298750. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0298750

Díaz-Loving R, Rivera-Aragón S, Villanueva GBT, Cruz LM. Las premisas histórico-socioculturales de la familia mexicana: su exploración desde las creencias y las normas. Revista Mexicana de Investigación en Psicología. 2011;3: 128–142.

Gearing RE, Brewer KB, Washburn M, et al. Mental health help-seeking in Mexico. Global Health Promotion. 2023;31(1):55-64. doi:10.1177/17579759231204357

Hietanen A-E, Pick S. Gender Stereotypes, Sexuality, and Culture in Mexico. Psychology of Gender Through the Lens of Culture: Theories and Applications. Springer International Publishing; 2015. pp. 1–410.

Sampson M, Yu M, Mauldin R, Mayorga A, Gonzalez LG. 'You withhold what you are feeling so you can have a family': Latinas' perceptions on community values and postpartum depression. Fam Med Community Health. 2021 Jul;9(3):e000504. doi: 10.1136/fmch-2020-000504. PMID: 34215669; PMCID: PMC8256751.